Friday, February 22, 2008
I don't know what has gotten into me recently. Why have I become so emotional. Things just happened too fast. There's many things I've been trying to hide from you. I really don't wish to make you sad or have another thing more to worry about.
I used to run to you whenever I encountered problems, cause you are the one who is willing to lend me a ear and give me some advice. However now its different. Since I've heard that you get sad over your previous ex's problem, I don't really dare to tell you my problems much already. Cause I don't wish you to be sad, I'd rather see you happy everyday. When you are sad, I get sad too, my heart will ache if you are troubled and tormented by stressed.
I love you to be your hyper self, cause I can see light of joy being reflected from your face which makes me happy too.
However, your mood affects my mood too. I don't know why recently I got so emotional. I wanted to slash myself again. There's this urge.
My heart aches terribly also. The pain can be felt literally. It makes me hard to breathe sometimes.
Sometimes I know that I'm too much. I know you are busy and yet I still request time from you to accompany me out.
When we were out, I can see that you are troubled, and I too felt sad. I'm afraid that if I say something wrongly you might get agitated.
After being with you, I actually picked up your good points. Like drinking herbal tea/more water, being nicer to people around me and etc.
I just want to tell you that I'm sorry to start all this problems. I wish all these could end now and we get back to what we used to be in the beginning, happy together. I really miss those times together. Could you don't leave me? I'm really afraid of losing you. You are very precious to me. One day with you, is enough to make me happy for the whole week already. Don't worry that you aren't good and etc I just love being with you. I want to tell you that I love you dearly. The love feeling is just as strong as the first love.
~IceCleric~
